for my little freaks, a trick or treat.
this track was recorded live at wythe hotel in brooklyn, september 2015. it was an improvised score to another film, but here i’ve edited together a strange montage of videos that have been slowly taking up all the space on my phone these last months. if you’re weird and want to have this spooky track in your playlist, you can download the audio here: https://hannahepperson.bandcamp.com/
I don’t know how to say it quite, but sometimes it’s almost too much - the miraculousness of being alive. In some ways this has been a most unbearable year, personally. Grief, loss, fear, anxiety about how many fucked up things we’ve done and keep doing to this earth, to each other. But then there is this pure life-force, and it seems to be resilient as all heaven and hell. I mean, to experience this gasp of consciousness and the infinite capacity of a singular and collective conscience! And all of this inside of the strange formula of elements that forge the raw body … my GOD it’s incredible. It really is miraculous, to be alive.
And so exhaustion and anxiety and grief and so much unknowing are nutrient-rich fodder for the full spectrum experience of life. There are moments of such extreme aloneness that can near about bring us to the brink of annihilation. And I wish so badly that in these moments, I could find you and hold you close in a life/death grip that would keep you from jumping. There are as many realities as there are creatures struggling to make meaning on this earth, and every one of those strange, fucked up and beautiful realities has some kernel of truth in it. Please know it to be so, and in moments of doubt and dissonance, find an album or a piece of literature or art that you love and let it hold you through the storms as they pass, violent and compassionate.
On that note … I have music for your embrace. I am sorry it is taking me so damn long to release it. Forgive me, stay with me, please hold on.
From Hannah Epperson’s 2 track EP - BURN - to be officially released February 2015. Performed live with Ajay Bhattacharyya in Vancouver, BC.
‘The smallest sprout shows there is really no death,
And if ever there was it led forward to life, and does not
wait at the end to arrest it,
And ceas’d the moment life appear’d.
All goes onward and outward, nothing collapses…“
- Walt Whitman
For brother Nick, on his birthday. I am so glad you were born.